"It's a funny old game" - The KPR Match Report

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Surrey FA County Cup

Keens Park Rangers Ressies 2 Camberley Town Youth 2 (KPR win 4-2 on penalties)

Goals: Owen Sutchbury, Vic Hamilton

Man-of-the-match: Leighton Loosely

After an impeccably observed minutes silence the visitors, rather than remember, will want to forget a painful defeat to the KPR ressies in the county cup.

While the opening exchanges suggested a close game, the visitors got ever more dominant as the minutes passed. And yet, they were extremely wasteful when it came to sticking the round thing in the back of the onion bag. The first chance was a glaring miss right in front of the goal.

Auld big ‘ead

Next, their forward had a free volley inside the six yard box, but put it wide and they should’ve scored what ought to have been a third after a strong header across the box was met with another – this one of the diving variety – from very close range that hit the post.

The one-way traffic continued until the ressies finally produced a chance after a super bit of vision and execution from Seamus set the returning Woodsy free, but his touch was too heavy and his shot, on the stretch, went over.

Rasher (centre) was not ‘HP’ with the first half performance

It proved a mere blip as the opposition’s dominance continued. The ressies back four were under serious pressure but they were holding on – just – as another a shot from distance shaved the outside of Leighton’s post. Leighton couldn’t rely on the opposition missing entirely and he was called upon to make a good double save with a low diving save to his right before bravely blocking the rebound without knowing the forward was offside.

Thereafter, normal service resumed and the opposition had another shot crash off the crossbar following a really good run down the right wing and a great shot just inside the box. Hilarity was now beginning to emerge with every squandered chance and the dark humour almost turned to joy after a rare attack saw Woodsy and Vic exchange passes before Vic forced their keeper into making a decent save.

Ollie takes on the defence

This was not enough to appease the birthday boy Rasher, who has had quite enough of the passive play and he gave Seamus a rather harsh earful which angered Seamus – who was playing very well as it happened – made a frustrated challenge he was lucky not to get booked for. Had the referee done so I think Rasher would have had to pay the fine.

As it transpired, when the ball finally went out of play, the referee settled for a stern word. Nonetheless, KPR were now getting more of a foothold now Vic was playing a more advanced role and Woody should’ve done better with his second clear chance of the match.

Incredibly the half ended 0-0 and it looked as if the massed supporters would be denied any goals as first, the visitors hit the post again within the first two minutes of the second before the ressies struck the woodwork after a beautiful strike from Dan was palmed onto the bar by the keeper, with manager Liam unable to control the rebound.

The referee illicits an early ‘double teapot’ from the opposition

The next save was Leighton who blocked a point blank shot brilliantly after the ressies inability to clear their lines was all too obvious. The ressies then mixed up their pack with Wallis, Jamal, Ollie and Rodin joining the fray. Regrettably, the goal we all feared arrived but it was arguably one that owed more to the ressies generosity rather than their good play.

And then, like busses, another soon followed from a corner, but there was still plenty of time to rectify matters. And the opportunity arose after the ressies were awarded a penalty after Vic was felled in the box. Although a generous decision, it was consistent given similar fouls previously, and Owen didn’t waste the chance to put the visitors under a bit of pressure.

The agony (background) and the ecstasy

As Woo observed with toughen firmly in cheek, the visitors were now ‘rocking’, and a sense of renewed vigor saw more play in their half. That the ressies were having more joy was made all the clearer by the visitors increased moaning, and the game was almost squared after an unconventional flick from Ollie was tipped over the bar by their keeper.

Hard to believe, the visitors hit the crossbar yet again with a direct free kick and it cost them as a lovely one-two between Ollie and Vic saw Vic get an improbable equaliser with what was almost the last touch of the match! Straight to penalties. And as much as Owen placed his well wide of the goal, Leighton saved one, before scoring one, and then saving another leaving Rodin the dubious honour of scoring an improbable winner.

Vic caught offside again!

The ressies celebrations contrasted with the visitor’s sour recriminations towards the excellent referee. Well, if she had a ‘stinker’ I think their players ought to look at the half a dozen, or more, excellent chances that they failed to put away.